Dear Self,

Two weeks ago you had a box full of 54 Rice Krispy treats (Thanks, M!). Now you have a pile of 10. And you’re going through that Easter chocolate alarmingly quickly, Chubby McChubbster.

I know what you’re thinking: “But I walk 3-5 miles a day!” According to your father, walking only counts as exercise if you’re over the age of 70. So you’re going to have to think of a better justification than that.

In the meantime, I’m confiscating your remaining treats.

It’s for your own good,
r