Dear Sidewalks of Namibia,

WTF. Why are you BUFFED and WAXED?! Ok, I know why. It makes you easier to sweep. I get that. You know what else it makes easier? BROKEN NECKS. I almost died several times today. I'm not trying to be dramatic. I actually had SEVERAL near-death experiences within a span of 24 hours.

Will you still love me if I'm a paraplegic?
r